It's Up to Me., by Orange Leung

It's Up to Me.

by Orange Leung

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	1.	It's Up to Me. 01:09		buy track
	2.	It's Up to Me (soundtrack) 01:09		buy track

about

我總是覺得自己是一pat屎
(I always felt like shit)
尤其當我只為了生存而成全別人的夢和光
(Especially when i feel like fulfilling others’ dreams to shine only for survival)
將自己掉向後面
(leaving myself behind)
直到我又與這些未被消化又超載的情緒獨處
(until i was all alone again with these unprocessed, overwhelming feelings)
我又退回去過度消費別人的生命
(i withdrew to over-consuming other’s life)
來麻木我這份對連結和原諒未曾表達過的渴望
(with the unexpressed desire for connections and forgiveness)
然後用拖延症的標籤批評自己
(then criticising myself with the label of procrastination)

而
(AND)
我一直都可以放開我告訴自己的故事
(i can always LET the story im telling myself GO)
選擇躲藏又好、好努力做各種事去證明自己值得開心自由發光又好
(whether i choose to hide or work so hard to prove that i deserve to live freely, happily & shine)
只要我還相信自己總是殘缺的
我做甚麼都會感覺自己是一pat屎的
(it feels like shit as long as im coming from the place (belief) of inner lack)

比起在熟悉既狹窄感裡追逐和被追逐
(instead of thinking im being chased all the time in the narrow familiarity,)
我按自己的步伐生活
(i just go steadily at my pace)
What I always want to do and be.
I do and be.
比起執迷於事情該如何發生
(instead of obsessing over how things must go)
我讓生命為我揭曉
(i let life unfold itself for me)
同時學會欣賞這趟旅程多一點
(and learn to appreciate the journey a bit more)
It’s Up to Me.
All the Time.

credits

released January 24, 2024

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Orange Leung Hong Kong

Overflowing Clarity

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